Birthdays

Birthdays are strange - so much expectation and so much introspection. I had some really nice presents on Wednesday (including a complete and very thoughtful surprise package in the post which made my day! Thanks, Carolyn!) and my daughter had made me a lovely card and a paper mouse. Yet still my pervading mood is pensive. I can't help wonderring what I've achieved in the last year and am I any closer to where I want to be. And when my husband points out all my achievements and the myriad ways we are closer to where we want to be, I still feel vaguely dissatisfied. Should I be doing better? Doing more? Doing something differently? I can't help but think that if I could only look at life in a completely different way I could come up with a radical change which would shake things up in a really serious and satisfying way. But try as I might I can't come up with that kind of insight. Maybe I'm just unsettled by the prospect of inevitable change in January.