Monday, 3 May 2010

Thoughts on Beltaine

Well, I haven't posted for a long time as I've had lots of stuff to work out in my head which has been too private to share. Finishing breast-feeding has really felt like the end of an era and has prompted a lot of soul-searching before realising that, obviously, the end of one era is always the beginning of a new one. This realisation has been liberating and exciting as well as terrifying and worrying. I've had to do a lot of thinking about what exactly I want to do nowadays. Who am I now that that first white-hot crucible of intense motherhood has cooled a little?

So, now I feel my creativity is returning, I want to focus more on my spirituality, spread my wings outside the family circle a little, get involved with things a little. But, as much as that attracts it, it also scares me a bit. The cycle of change has already started though, and I can't stop it. I don't want to stop it. I'm sure that it's no coincidence that my son stopped feeding just before the Spring Equinox, kicking off a year's cycle of change and growth. I wonder where we'll by by the winter solstice this year?

4 comments:

Becky said...

Nice to hear from you again Liz :-) Keep us posted on your upcoming changes!

Becky
xx

bethnoir said...

good to hear that you are feeling positive about the changes. My son is ten in a few weeks, that makes me feel like something is lost, but of course it isn't really. It's good progress :-)

rossmountney said...

Hi Liz,
just wanted to say how I feel for you reading this blog - a bit late I know! Changes are such a deep part of our parenting journey, diffiult to let go sometimes and allow! I'm just changing through the closure of our HE, my eldest child moving on from the family home, and hopefully the return to more creativity after all those HE years. Sometimes heart wrenching, but always new beauty to come. Hang in there! Ross
http://rossmountney.wordpress.com

nocton4 said...

Happy Solstice to you all, brightest blessings xx